Personal log - April Coswell

Moderators: Drewski Northman, Siobhan Crystal

User avatar
April Coswell
Command - Commodore
Command - Commodore
Posts: 322
Joined: 100428.1847
Duty Post: Executive Officer - USS Maxwell
Ship/Station Posted:
Grid:
Contact:

190212.1936

Personal log, April Coswell, Stardate... 190210.1958, I believe.

It’s been a while, computer.

=^=Previous personal log by Captain April Coswell was on Stardate 1806...=^=

Okay, okay, I wasn’t asking for a specific date, jeese. I know how long it’s been.

I guess... I guess that words come easiest when you need them to come and name things that you’re seeing, experiencing or feeling... or maybe I’ve just been procrastinating.

April gets up and pads to the coffee table to get the cup of chai she just got called up from the mess hall.

Commodore Gerhadsen... Nora, that is... got requested to mediate a rather delicate peace negotiation not far from Pinastri. She left some hours ago on the Horizon... how long it’ll take, I have no idea. I hear my dad’s voice in my head saying « It’ll take as long as it needs, and as long as it takes for them to realize they need peace ».

That was, of course, Bruce Coswell at his best - working the room at a diplomatic reception, or telling me and Alyson how his latest peace negotiation had gone. Nobody saw the flipside, the demons that had my dad in their hold... except me. I was the one who woke him up on the sofa at 1am, an empty bottle of whiskey next to him, and helped him to bed and into his PJ’s. And that’s when I swore never, ever to let that happen to me.

I caught a couple of glimpses of the Mirror version of myself these past few days. On the viewscreen. Wearing a slightly revealing red skirt and vest uniform. Purple hair. Black mascara and lipstick. And...

She was drunk.

It was so clear. I’ve seen that look in my dad’s eyes. A slight, ever so slight cloudy quality to them. And now... I’ve seen it on someone who wears my face.

I wish... I don’t know what I wish. Maybe, that I could throttle her. Talk some sense into her. Scream at her. But...

I have no idea what life circumstances led the April Coswell from that universe to fall into the grip of the same demons as my father. But I was shown how easily it can happen. As if I didn’t know already.

Roads not taken, roads not taken... and the path hewn for us by the fortunes of our upbringing.

So... I have no idea how long the Commodore’s peace negotiations will take. But in the meantime, the Maxwell’s under my watch. Our orders are to make our way to the Ullipallilli system to restock... prior to leaving for another foray into the Hapke cluster.

And that... brings back uneasy memories of its own.

Computer, end log and save.
Captain April Samantha Coswell
Executive Officer, USS Maxwell
User avatar
April Coswell
Command - Commodore
Command - Commodore
Posts: 322
Joined: 100428.1847
Duty Post: Executive Officer - USS Maxwell
Ship/Station Posted:
Grid:
Contact:

190510.1535

Personal log, April Coswell, Stardate 190506.1906.

I swear, I can feel when the Maxwell wades into unchartered waters. It's like there's some slight change in the aspect of the stars outside the ship... in the feeling of loneliness that being this far from Pinastri brings. Of course, Nora would probably gently remonstrate to me about being overly lyrical and touchy-feely. Which, I suppose, I am. But...

"Always trust your intuition, April. If you feel your spider sense tingling, there's a reason why it's happening." My dad used to say that he learned that kernel of wisdom from Curzon Dax himself. But as my dad never met a tall tale he didn't like... well, in any case.

I feel my spider sense tingling about the string of errands we've been running. The stop at Ullipallilli station, the run-in with the Oclar, and now, after we just dropped off the Vesuvian survivors, Jak tells me that the core's fuel is halfway depleted and that we need to refuel. So... we're headed to the Amenemhat system next door to do that.

It's not that things are dangerous. It's just that they're harder than they should be. And that makes me wonder about what lies ahead in the Hapke cluster. Last time we were there, the Privari Archon tossed us in the slammer and tried to claim our ship. I don't... want to lose that sense of wonder and that wanderlust that have been feeding my career in space. But I have a crew to look after as well.

Today is Alyson's birthday. I'm 32, so that would make her... 25.

April walks to her desk and picks up a picture of herself with her younger sister - a tall girl with long, black hair framing a narrow face with wide blue eyes and a slightly amused smirk.

Last time I saw you, I had to put you in the brig. To protect you from your own, reckless self. I hope you've found your way by now...

April sets down the picture and moves to the window, staring at the stars, fighting the sudden sadness at realizing she misses her sister.

Sometimes I wish I could just turn this ship around and go find you... but you're a big girl now, aren't y...

=^=Bridge to Captain Coswell=^=

April sighs and taps her combadge =^=Go ahead=^=

=^=We're approaching the Amenemhat system, Captain=^=

=^=Understood. On my way.=^=

April turns to leave and then looks once more at the picture of her kid sister, making a silent promise to herself.

Computer, end log.
Captain April Samantha Coswell
Executive Officer, USS Maxwell
User avatar
April Coswell
Command - Commodore
Command - Commodore
Posts: 322
Joined: 100428.1847
Duty Post: Executive Officer - USS Maxwell
Ship/Station Posted:
Grid:
Contact:

190810.1149

Personal log, April Coswell, Stardate 190810.1332

It's been a long, long time since I've been this sick. It started shortly after we left the Babbage planet. I couldn't keep any food down, and I started running a dangerously high fever. I remember my body aching from the endless shivering. I remember Dr. Mesmerizer nervously running her hands through her hair as she looked at blood samples. And then, I remember sleeping a lot.

I woke up three days ago in a bigger sickbay than I'm used to. Dr. Mesmeriser was nowhere in sight. The attending physician, a very nice Denobulan named Thalax, informed me that I was on Starbase L-247. He went on to explain that I had contracted a serious bacterial infection which had spread from my digestive tract to my blood. Dr. Thalax told me that Dr. Mesmerizer, on the Maxwell, had started me on a full course of aggressive antibiotics while keeping me mostly under sedation to give my system the best fighting chance to lick this thing. She was also able to trace the bacteria back to the pies I ate on the Babbage planet... which makes sense as I felt ill shortly after having them.

I of course asked why Dr. Mesmerizer had decided that she couldn't treat me on the Maxwell. Dr. Thalax said that the ship's CO had made that determination and, as the ship was dropping some departing personnel off at the station, had dropped me off as well.

It struck me as sort of unceremonious, to be honest. Not something that Jayce would do. I said so to Thalax, who replied "Oh no, I mean Captain Pendleton."

They put Pendleton in charge of my ship during my illness. And for some reason she decided to drop me off like some merchandise. I prodded Thalax for more info but he spread his hands and grinned that wide Denobulan grin and told me he didn't know.

Luckily, the infection is out of my system, although I'm still on a restricted diet for a couple of days and have some follow-up injections for a couple of weeks - Dr. Thalax told me he already transferred the paperwork to Dr. Mesmeriser on the Maxwell. For sure, I've lost weight and I'm only just getting over the feeling that I got run over by a Delta flyer.

Still... in the best of circumstances, I'd be on pins and needles to get back on the bridge of the Maxwell. Sitting in bed drawing and sketching to pass the time like I'm doing right now is not something that comes easily or naturally to me. If she were here, Nora would smile and shake her head at my impulsiveness. I know, I know...

But here's the thing. It's Pendleton in the center seat. Pendleton who wanted to mothball the Maxwell in the first place. I have no idea what her orders are. That, Dr. Thalax can't tell me. But the very notion of her in command of the Maxwell sets my spider sense off on red alert.

Thalax wants me resting in what he calls a "stress-free environment", and won't let me access comms or the database for another 24 hours. So I'm sitting here drawing, sketching... but the station commander, Captain Alicia Austen, has been by and I have told her that I'd appreciate some information on how I was transferred here, and who are the "departing crew members" Thalax told me about.

In the meantime... I guess I'll sharpen that pencil some more.

Computer, end log.
Captain April Samantha Coswell
Executive Officer, USS Maxwell
Post Reply

Return to “USS Atlas Archive”